Im one of those people who feels better once there is a plan in place. Deep down, I might know that the plan wont come to fruition - but oh I do like my researching and piecing together the hypothetical. I once put together a complete summer vacation to Prague in 24 hours simply because Charles had mentioned that he might have a conference near there and he had always wanted to see the beautiful architecture of Prague. Two days after we had this conversation he said the conference wasn't on, and I had to cancel the flights and apologise to all the lovely B&B People who responded to my emails.
We are getting to the stage where I am feeling like we have a good plan in place for Sebastian. No results yet, but there is a plan. I feel relief. But I am also wondering how many people I have ticked off in the process.
Whether your child is special needs or not, parents need to be their child's advocate. No one else is going to do it. With a special needs child - you are constantly walking the fine line. Do parents of special needs children come across as overly aggressive? Do we need to be?
I am very aware that teachers are overworked. THere is nothing 8.30-3.30 about their job. And I don't like having to send emails that will add to their workload.
Never once has any teacher Sebastian has had made us feel like we were taking up time - but it's always there. You realise the teacher doesn't mind going the extra mile, but doesn't have to for everyone. It's you who is asking more of them....again. Please fill out this report, please take 10 minutes to talk to me. Please keep an eye on my child. I am asking more of you than other people do.
This week someone described me as "very aggressive". When their confidant said, "Tess is a really good friend of mine", they started to backtrack. "Well she has to be, otherwise her opinion wasn't going to get heard."
I cringe when I hear myself described as aggressive. I don't like being aggressive. I don't like creating extra work for people. But if being aggressive is what it takes to get answers and action, I will. I will apologise every time I step on someone else's toes, but I will be heard. If I am not my child's advocate, who will be?
KINDER THAN NECESSARY DAY2
I wasn't allowed to leave the house today, and without the internet the kinder than necessary might have been tough. I wrote an email to a blogger and shared that I had read a book he had published years before. This blogger is not well, and he wrote back, pleased that strangers would remember his words long after his time on earth is done.