Dim Sum Mum - Tess' Little Pieces:

ahhhh, perspective.

i took carys (left, sela right) to her physio appointment today. she goes to the duchess of kent rehabilitation centre. the centre itself is quite nice, high ceilings, a hydrotherapy pool, easy listening canto-pop piping through loudspeakers, people moving around doing their exercises. it was a busy day in the centre. our wonderful PT annie was a little late, and so i started one of the exercises we do at home, getting carys into a sitting position and letting her watch and reach for items of interest. i support her from behind while she is reaching.

while i am not best pleased knowing that carys (left, sela right) may have cerebral palsy, i do know enough to see that she does not have an extreme case of CP. i have always felt blessed knowing that CP is not a degenerative disease. if carys does have CP, she will not experience the trauma that other persons with degenerative diseases have, watching yourself not be able to accomplish what you could one day, week, month or year ago. what a huge blessing.

today, as carys reached, we saw people recovering from car accidents learning to walk again. we saw children confined to wheelchairs trying to lift their legs. we saw a person who had recently lost a hand, learning basic skills with his left hand. we saw courage.

although i have epilepsy and all the junk that comes with that, i consider myself to have good health. others, who have seen me have seizures might be horrified by that statement, but it's my blog not theirs.

sebastian's speech impediment hurts me, not because i am worried he won't "make it" in the world, but because i am his mother and watching him struggle to keep up and to be involved in a conversation is painful. i worry about jasper, sela and little carys in particular, their health.

but when all is said and done, we are blessed. i have felt God's presence, and i believe seen it, during the roughest times of my life. i know magnificent charles and i are not alone as we attempt to parent, and receive good and bad news regarding the babies. i have been whinging in this blog lately because truthfully, some aspects of my life aren't easy.

but today i was reminded that having two legs that work, lungs and heart that don't need medical assistance to breathe, living children, and a healthy body make my basic life pretty wonderful from a lot of people's perspective.

some aspects of my life aren't easy. my life would be easier if i had fewer children. i am so grateful to have a not easy life.

and now i will go change a nappy.