choosing not to even get involved in the sanitary aspects to a thong debate, i'm moving on to our helpers.

people not in asia tend to have a funny reaction to the news that we have helpers. lots of domestic helpers are abused terribly, and don't report it. some people judge us because we have helpers.

very few of those people are mothers with small children. these women ask about my helpers the way someone who has just had that gastro surgery that removes your stomach talks about a buffet. i cannot provide enough details.

tell me about how they clean

well, we have a schedule of how many times a week things should be done. there are some people in hong kong who arrive here and hire a helper and suddenly want the bed linen changed every day.

so they vacuum and dust?

sure.

and would they polish silver and wash the floors?

sure, if those floors didn't get cleaned our floors wouldn't be wood anymore, they would be vomit tiling by this stage.

and the laundry, tell me about the laundry

okay, well, they pick up the laundry from each of the baskets and do the laundry.

no no no, tell me how they sort it.

okay, um, they sort it.

and they go through the pockets?

well, yes.

they iron too, right?

we don't have a lot of ironing, but yes, they do it.

and when you go out at night, do you have to pay them extra to stay in?

everyone is in bed by 7.30, so if we are going out we ask them to bring their friends over and they have a meal at our place.

right, but the mornings, what happens then?

well, it all depends on what time the babies wake up.

if they wake up early, will your helper take care of them for you?

if she was already awake, probably, but sometimes she doesn't hear them.

but she would if you asked, right?

yes.

you can sleep in?

yes.

or go back to bed?

yes.

and they also cook for you?

yes, sometimes i like to cook for us, and you wouldn't ask a helper to make you a plate of scrambled egg, but yes, they do help with sebastians meals and for dinner parties.

dinner parties?

well, lita used to work at the embassy and is a very good cook, and with her previous job she organised dinner parties for eight to 40 guests.

do they wash up at the end of the evening when youre knackered and just want to hit the bed?

i am sure they would if we asked, but charles and i do it.

the cook for you, they clean, they do laundry, they look after the babies so you can get out.

i know, we're very lucky.

and how much does it cost you? tell me again.

not a lot.

no, how much exactly in american dollars.

okay, minimum wage is about $423.00 us per month. we pay over $550, and also include a food allowance and if they have had a long day we or helped out on their day off when magnificent has been out of town, we give them an extra holiday and extra money.

but you say you only have to give them two weeks holiday every two years?

yes, that's the law. but with lita for example, we gave her two weeks off the first 10 months she was with us, she just came back from a two week holiday and after we return from canada, she will have another two weeks.

its just so amazing. you're so lucky. there is no union, no one to say "no, you hired her as a nanny, she doesn't have to clean the carpets", nothing.

so this isn't the time to tell you they do windows too?

Comments

[mollyv]

I used to like you - now I am not so sure. :)

[Lioness]

The way I see it, you're all terribly lucky.

[KatS]

Oh, please, tell me more. I am sitting here fantasizing about someone watching the babies while I sleep late. AND doing my ironing. More helper stories, please?

[Steph]

What happens when you travel? Do they come along (because I can't imagine navigating airports and flying with the gang). Or are they on paid or unpaid vacation then? It does sound like a win/win all around. Love your descriptions of life in HK!

[Maggs]

: You are very lucky to have the extra help but it's not like you don't need it! People need to mind their own business.

[Jill]

Its worth every darned penny. Something I should have arranged sooner. Melo, our Filipina nanny that came from HK, is our live-in angel. The boys love her, and we love her. As a mum to twin toddler lads and both parents as shift-workers (police officers), I can't say how much this has made our lives so survivable. She is so honest, hard-working and above all else, Kind. I am so happy that you have helpers as you get to spend time with your children, and when it comes to consoling more than one, or meeting the needs of the majority...you have assistance. I don't think I would have been in this position without your advice months and months ago. I get to enjoy the most wonderful moments with the boys while having the extra set of hands nearby to free me up from the chores to do so.

So if Melo is my angel, then you are definitely my Angel Broker. Thank you for your tales of HK and the life you live there.

(kiss) XXOO

[Cricket]

Wow, I only have one kid, but I sure need help. I suck at all that stuff and am always amazed at anyone good at it. My relief will come in the form of a kind husband one day. As you already have.

[mollyv]

popping back in to say - you KNOW I was kidding you. I have help too - felt guilty about it for, oh, about 5 minutes, then moved on to more important things. I LOVE having help. Am very very jealous at the rate you get yours at, however. Here in sunny Florida, we are paying a fortune, but worth every penny!

[knobody]

molly, i'm in sunny florida too!

and tess, i am very jealous of your help. i do admit to having some help in the form of sending sagan to the babysitter's. i also have two sets of grandparents here (one set moved here last month, just), and it does come in handy. if i didn't have grandparents, i'd have to rent them. just yesterday we had three grandparents here, sagan at the sitters, and guess what? we found our garage! it's weird how much space we had lying around and didn't even know it.

historically we lived in extended family units. now that we don't do that so much, hiring help to replace that family only makes sense. driving yourself insane trying to go it alone is what is crazy! and if lita or mila ever want a vacation in sunny florida....

[Kara Honigman]

Hey Tess, help is easy to find, but good help isn't. There are so many issues, the biggest one being trust. I have just recently hired a wonderful young lady to come over twice a week to help with the laundry, dishes, general cleaning and the daily endeavor of sweeping and mopping the floors.(think geckko poops) and standard wage for her is 10.00Fijian per day. approx 5 bucks USD. I feel guilty in paying her so little so she generally makes 15 FJ per day. In this country, minimum wages are 1.50fj per hour. The girls/ladies who get hired to be "housegirls" as they are reffered to (local term, not expat one)make excellent wages and are always the 'sharp dressed' ones around town.
SO after 2.5 years of doing it myself my friends here are relieved that I have finally got some sense to get some help. It's not like we could affford it in Canada and I have enough second hand shoes (well, flip flops really) to last me several more years. I may as well, hire someone and it creates employment and income for one young lady. I am so lucky as "Nai" is a very trustworthy and intelligent lady to have around. Trust is hard to come by and Nai is easy to trust my children with (not that I've needed to leave them with her but if I did...) and I can leave my house with her.
In what you say about MIla and Lita, you also have a trust that runneth deep. good on yah blinky.(Do you guys know Blinky Bill? Aussie cartoon about a koala that save his peeps from the wood chip mill?)