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February 16, 2006

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laura

Amen!

I am often confused, because some of the "experts" say to ignore some behaviours because it just draws attention to them. They say to focus on the positive, not the negative. And they also say that we need to let the kids resolve disagreements on their own.

To do that, we need to teach them how. To teach them, we need to be be there every second. And to be there every second, we need to NEVER be too tired and have 15 arms and legs and somehow be everywhere at once. Have boundless energy and run over there everytime we hear a scuffle.

I also find the more of them there are, the harder time I have of following through. If we happen to be working on Cheekiness from one, and I just put something in the oven and another one just stubbed their toe, is crying and needs kisses, while another is trying to have a deep, important conversation with me, how am I supposed to instantly drop all that and go deal with the cheeky one?? EVERY TIME he is cheeky?? Which is every 10 minutes some days?? *sigh*

It is the hardest job I have ever had and I just pray I am not screwing them up too much!

mollyv

preach on, sister! When I have had enough sleep I do better!
from one multiple mom to another, I say - we are doing the best we can and that needs to be good enough!

AngelaM

Well said Tess! I think the big thing is that we keep trying. The not giving up, and persevering, even if you stumble and fall shows our kids that sometimes it is not the destination, but the journey that matters more. And as parents, we are obviously their biggest fans, cheering them on and giving them the strength to keep on journeying. (hmm.. I think I just made up a word)

Viscouse

Hear hear on the journey/destination bit. But sadly, at certain points along the way, you realize you've reached a destination (wherever you are at that moment), and can reflect on the journey. While I will try to do my level best, I am confident that somewhere my girls will be throughouly pissed at me for screwing up their life. I was with my parents. I never want that, but somehow see it coming. I dunno. If you concentrate on being your children's best friend, you can't be a good parent. So at times they will hate you. I guess if the overall look back has more God, knowledge, compassion, discernment, curiousity and love than all the negatives, you're doing okay. Me? I'll be happy if my girls keep out of jail.

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