sunny days

grade seven brought about the avent of my first boyfriend. there had been crushes, and whatnot, but grade seven brought about a boy called sunny. not his real name of course, that would have been steven. we call him sunny not as a reflection on the sunny days we spent together (in nothern canada, very few days are sunny)...but as a nickname. not one he appreciated at the time, but a sweet nickname for a very sweet boy.

what brought steven and tessie together? let's see. we were in the same homeroom. and also, we hadn't gone to the same elementary school, so it was less awkward (note i didn't say easy) to make that, "hey i think you're kind of cool" transition (helped by note passing and the best friend).

there are always well matched couples, and looking at the tessie and steven matching critically, i think we probably were well matched. although, to be strictly fair, at that very fun 12-13 stage, good looking boys are rarer than good looking girls, and folks, steven was cute. taller than me, a prerequisite, and even older than me, tough when your birthday is in march, but there you go. his hair feathered nicely and he wore wayne gretzky jeans. obviously a match for this edmonton oilers girl.

he was also smart. he was one of the handful of kids in enrichment. enrichment kids had been earmarked as critical, creative, outside the box thinkers, not necessarily honour roll types. steven was both if i remember correctly. i wasnt an enrichment girl, i was a hard worker.

my parents liked him. my dad primarily because steven played hockey and liked the oilers, and held down an after school job. "shows character". he looked my dad in the eye when he talked with him and could carry on conversations about hockey leagues and whatever else they discussed while i was final netting my hair.

my mum liked steve because he was smart and polite and a "nice boy". i remember at their first meeting she asked some thinly veiled questions meant to unveil any possible drug use (this was yellowknife, anything was possible even in 1982). satisfied, she then looked at his bare arms and made a typical nurses comment.... "you have great veins for needles, don't you?...." he sort of looked at me and gave me a "is SHE on drugs?" look and when i provided no assistance on how the conversation should go, he smiled and said, "yes?"

just to give you an idea of what a desireable heartbreaker i was, so alluring was the pre-teen tess that sunny preferred, chose, even, to play dungeons and dragons one weekend night a week, and hang out with me on the other instead of hang out with me on both weekend evenings. (we started dating when he asked me to "go around", and we dated by hanging around, or "going out".) our dates mainly consisted of going to the movies or hanging around at my place with my best friend and her boyfriend.

lots of memories of listening to records, dimming the lights, and occasionally, my parents would display their flexibility by snaking their arm around the corner of the room and turn up the lights, just to make sure there was no "petting". and there wasn't.  air supply, pat benetar, chicago, corey hart.

we made pizza subs to help subsidise sunny's favourite maths teacher science club. we also went roller skating. unlike many boys, he was a good roller skater because he ice skated (goalie). he would attend my choir productions, tournaments or swim meets. and i was a rink rat, i admit it. i went to a lot of his games. sometimes my dad would come with me and stay for a period or two, because he liked supporting sunny.

sunny was quick witted (and tempered too,) sarcastic, we could have good laughs, particularly when they were at someone else's expense. he was a merciless mimic, and thinking about it, i bet he did a fantastic tess imitation.

there is something funny about having a romance with a person in the north...no matter your age you have to reconcile that the person with the snot frozen around their nose is the person that you want to kiss, that if you are brave to kiss outside and take your scarves off, your noses will start to freeze quickly, so make it a short smooch.

what i regret is that we rarely talked. we both were covering up a lot of stuff, going on with our friends that we couldn't talk about, because that would really mean growing up, and i don't think either one of us wanted to. it was confusing, it was troubling, and eventually, it ended. my epilepsy was becoming an issue. not that i would ever talk about it. but drugs were increasing, and so did my weight. not that he would ever say anything. not because of either of us, but because of sitautions around us. and we didn't talk for 8 years. i think i am right on this. you look back on those times together, and you think, did i know them? no.and that is sad, because he is a great person.

the best news is, that i did get to know him, over a very short period of time, about 10 years ago. just before we met our spouses, actually. it was Christmas 1996 and graeme called from the bar, and said, hey tessie, blast from the past!" and a voice screamed at me, "hey! we haven't talked in 12 years! get over here!" it was sunny, also home for Christmas. at 26 he was twice as good looking as he was at 13 and although he is AGES away from 39, i am sure his wife would say he is three times as better looking now.

we got together and talked and the stories and truth tumbled out. what was really happening in our lives way back in 1982. what was happening now. there was a little romance. it was a really great few days. and then he went back to his world, and met his beautiful wife, and i met magnificent, and here we all are.

during that Christmas 1996 period we went to the movies, (no our names were no longer engraved on the seats), and a former classmate jamie richard, saw us and started laughing. "together again!" and it was like we were together again, finally saying what we had wanted to then. long ago actions, events made sense.

the other day steve got in touch again. it was so good to hear from him, to see pictures of his beautiful family. there is such a special place for childhood friends. i can't remember the name of the restaurant i ate at last week, but i can still remember how many slices of cheese go on a pizza sub. there is a precious place in our hearts for those memories, and those friends.

Comments

[joeinvegas]

Well, why did you break up? Poor excuses given. But it's nice to go back and find somebody still nice.

[Maureen aka Mo aka Grandmother aka Mozilla]

Did I honestly say that? I can't imagine how you have kept me on as your mother!! Yes Steven was/is a nice fellow and I too am glad that he is happily married and enjoying his life.

Love, M xox

[Maggs]

Hi Tess, just wanted to stop in and say hi to my hero and that I miss you.

XOXOXO
Maggs

[laura]

This was wonderful. I know I have said it before, but I love the way you write. I feel almost like I am there with you!!!

Was just listening to Corey Hart yesterday. And Rush! Remember Rush??

That is such a neat trip down Memory Lane!

[Leslie]

It is lovely to have friends that you've known "forever". How nice that you two keep in touch.

[jill]

You've piqued my curiosity...Steve...hmmmm...I knew lots of nice Steves in Yellowknife - so no matter which one it was, you did have good taste. What a wonderful walk through memory lane. Thanks for reminding me about the frozen snot kisses...I completely forgot and its so true, so very true. You captured young northern love so well in so few sentances.

XOXO