the dalaimumma

the other day i took jasper to an appointment at the queen mary hospital. food played a major part of the waiting room experience so jasper was fairly good natured and as he was rambling around the place looking for people who would give him less healthy food than the stuff he was none the less eating, i noticed a couple walking in. new parents with fresh babies. one baby per parent. twins. how unusual i thought and started watching them.

they had obviously given this twin thing some thought, because they were on the ball. the mum, who was carrying the little boy, had the blue bag and the blue blankets and the blue rim around the bottle and the blue soother. the dad (who was wearing blue....should we report him?) was carrying a either girl or boy who had been appointed the colour green. they had two baby bjorns (which contained the babies) each had a baby sling slung over their arm and were each pushing a baby stroller. they were either hiding quads somewhere, or they were covering all their bases.

it threw them for a loop when mum bent down too low and the soother dropped out of blue's mouth on to the floor. she rummaged around in her bag and when she couldn't find a spare soother, tried to calm her child by patting it. i of course was mentally screaming SWADDLE THE KID, SWADDLE THE KID, but what can you do but watch. blue started howling, and if i was that mother i would have popped that soother into my own mouth (thereby sanitizing it) and thrown in back into blue's mouth. but that was not to be. she hissed at her husband, who found a gerber soother (i recognise the gerber soother because they are the same ones that sebastian used to use) and handed it to her.

SOOTHER CLIP! i felt like screaming, but stayed silent.

his bag seemed to be full of the nappies and wipes, green's medical stuff and bottles while hers was extra clothes, blue's medical papers, extra blankets, rattles (ignored), basically all the stuff that could be classified as nonessential. he was constantly rooting around the bag and i felt like advising them either to put the bag between them (ding dong!) or to pack individually.

this couple was out of their element. one baby is tough enough, but two? should i say something? i have experience in this matter. yet if i said something they might think (correctly) that it was powerfully obvious that they needed help. but solidarity among parents, right? i want these people to sleep at some point.

i approached them. didn't ask if the kids were twins, or if the adults were first time parents. didn't immediately explain that i have triplets, because sometimes that comes across that because my volume of children is higher, i must automatically be a better parent, which is so not true. but i had a good leeway question, i asked if they had joined the mum's of multiples club here in hong kong.

"i didn't know there was a thing" he admitted, while she said that she had heard of it but didn't know how to get in touch with us. i took down her number, and asked about the babies. talked about their birth, they started explaining to me about multiples and having twins at queen mary, which to be fair, i know nothing about. i mentioned that i had jasper there and they asked if he was my only one, and at this point, i said that there were three more, and that jasper was a triplet.

they could have gone hostile, but they didn't. instead i became the dalaimumma. questions flowed left and right as to how, when, where, who and why. i gave them the very truthful answer that once your kids have left that stage, you forget how old they were when it happened. or when it should happen. and that they should not be concerned if their four week old darlings were or were not doing anything. unless they were not filling their nappies or eating. those were the only pre-requisites. i think i lost some credibility in their eyes when jasper dropped some apple on the seat and i didn't mind that he picked it up and ate it, and when he put a car that had been on the ground into his mouth. lax parenting, germs and all that. to each their own, right?

they were a very nice couple and talking with them made me so glad that sebasitan came along before the triplets. thank goodness we had the experience of one kid and were relatively easy going before the three came along. soon after jasper and i were called in to see the dr and by the time we got out, they were gone.

never found out green's gender.