young and old

brangelina having twins! and the always subtle jack black breaking the news to the world -- i love that part.

our book club discussed WATER FOR ELEPHANTS last night - a book by canadian sara gruen. the opening sentence of the book is, "i am either 90 or 93. I forget". compounded by the fact that i recently saw THE SAVAGES (yay laura linney and philip seymour hoffman) - these past couple of weeks have made me very aware that one day, God willing, i am going to be very old. and the indignities that come with it. people thinking that they know better than you do what is better for you. (and they might, but still, that is frustrating also).

if a young, gorgeous, confident girl with flashy hair and mac lip glass announces, "the scent of poison and obsession perfume makes me ill. those heavy topnotes." people accept it. i drink coke but hate pepsi. oh i understand., mee tooo!! i thought i was the only one....

if a senior were to declare that, what is to say that they would be written off as truculent? overly particular?

truthfully, i loved the research & historical aspect of the book, but i felt the characters were poorly developed. everything but the story was great. the others seemed to agree, but we did talk alot about aging, how it is so tough unless you have the money to do it right. we also discussed why wages are so low for health care providers working in senior citizens homes.

in the character, protagonist jacob is upset that one of his children didn't take him in. we discussed how we would feel. all of us living so far away from our parents, if we were asked to come home and care for a remaining parent. oh, it was a tough discussion at times.

one thing i did have a clear conscience about is that i have always been interested in my grandparents lives. my gran is the only remaining grandparent i have, and she is blessed with a clear memory. she lived in challenging times, she was a war bride, but has wonderful stories of life before the war, living with sisters and a lovely younger brother, my adorable uncle miles, how she and grandad met, courted and wed, life during those lonely and uncertain war years, and then the homecoming. and the following years, which are always good for blackmail purposes. so i do listen to her stories, unless she starts talking about how nice my sister pam is, and then i have to change the subject, because really, who needs to hear about how great pam is !!! it's not like she's a neuro surgery nurse or anything.

(i digress).

one day i hope i will be very old. when i imagine myself as very old, i don't imagine any of the indignities. i just imagine no children asking me to wipe their bottoms and charles and i living somewhere near the water so he can make boats and i can read near it. it is unrealistic.

final statement: i recommend water for elephants. next month we're reading the handmaid's tale. anyone with insight into that, please send intelligent questions and answers.

Comments

[Trace]

I enjoyed "Water for Elephants" too. It is the book we're reading for my book club this month.

[Dad aka GDad Blake]

The next in the series will be "Water in the Elephant", then " Water from the Elephant" then a flood of books so to speak.

Love to all....Dad

[Auntie Pammie]

I am pretty spectacular ,, I love it :-).
I was a neurosurgery nurse, but now I am doing my plastics rotation.. sigh
Love to you all ..
Auntie Pammie xoxo

[Michelle]

I can speak from experience. When your parents need you, you find a way to be there.

My poor mother was ill for the last 2 years of her life and I flew home every month for those 2 years. Sometimes I would stay a week sometimes longer. I was exhausted but I would do it again. The last 2 months of her life I was there everyday.

Then 4 months after mom passed away, dad had to have surgery, again I dropped everything and was there for him for 2 1/2 months.

Finally I was able to explain to him that I needed to come home to be with my family and we would love for him to come with us. AND HE DID.

Dad lives with us now and it is going well. He gets homesick but we work through it.

I try not to treat my dad like I know what is best for him. I give him chores to do around house. He likes to feel useful and to contribute.

Sorry I hi-jacked your blog.

[Elaine]

I agree with you on "Water for Elephants." Parts of it were very good, but I thought some of the characters weren't developed well enough, and some of the action happened far too fast. And I HATED the ending!

[Lucy Moran]

Hi Tess,

Water for Elephants was my bookclub book last month too!

I know what you mean about being away from family. Last week we had to drop everything and fly to Cairns to Stu's grandmother funeral. We didn't go so much for her, but for Stu's grandfather (91 yrs) and Stu's dad. I think you know intuitively when you need to be there physically versus just emotionally supportive over the phone.